Breaking Free from Limiting Beliefs
What Are Limiting Beliefs?
We all have them! Even after years of personal growth, limiting beliefs can still surface. Why? Because every belief serves a purpose at some point, but when it starts restricting your potential, it may be time to let it go.
Limiting beliefs hold you back from fully expressing yourself and living a fulfilling life. They are often formed during childhood, influenced by parents, caregivers, teachers, society, culture, and religion. Every experience leaves an imprint, shaping the way we see ourselves and the world, even if we’re not consciously aware of it.
How Are Limiting Beliefs Formed?
Many limiting beliefs develop from emotionally charged childhood experiences. For example:
You wanted a toy at the supermarket, but your parents said, “We don’t have money for that.” Even without fully understanding the concept of money, you may internalise the belief that money is scarce or that you shouldn’t spend money on things that bring joy.
You observed family dynamics and unconsciously decided on a role to ‘fit in’. If your parents didn’t fully take on their parental role, you might have stepped up as the ‘caretaker’, always putting others’ needs before your own. As an adult, this can manifest as over-responsibility and an inability to prioritise yourself.
These beliefs shape our reality, influencing how we think, act, and feel. Even siblings raised in the same household can develop completely different beliefs based on their unique interpretations of experiences.
Every limiting belief has a childhood registry, and as we go through life, we unknowingly reinforce them. For instance, if you grew up hearing “money is scarce,” as an adult, you may unconsciously avoid opportunities that could bring financial growth, reinforcing the belief.
Many of my clients initially say they had ‘the perfect childhood,’ only to later realise they absorbed limiting beliefs without noticing. For example, they may have learned to suppress emotions because they were taught that expressing feelings was ‘too much’ or ‘burdensome’ to others. Others may have learned that love and approval were conditional, making them strive for perfection to feel worthy.
Common Limiting Beliefs Formed in Childhood
Here are some limiting beliefs many people pick up as children:
“I am not good enough.”
“Money is scarce and hard to earn.”
“I must take care of others before myself.”
“I need to be perfect to be loved.”
“Expressing emotions is a sign of weakness.”
“I don’t deserve success or happiness.”
“It’s selfish to prioritise my own needs.”
Why Is It Important to Recognise Limiting Beliefs?
Awareness gives you a choice: to continue with the belief or to change it. While change takes effort, consistency, and self-compassion, staying the same can also be difficult—it keeps you stuck in patterns that don’t serve you.
If you’ve ever heard, “We create our own reality,” and dismissed it as nonsense, consider this: Our reality is shaped by our thoughts, perspectives, and deeply held beliefs. If you think life is hard, it will feel hard. But if you shift your thinking from “Life is hard” to “Today I feel overwhelmed, but I can handle this challenge differently,” you regain a sense of control and possibility.
Everything in the physical world starts as a thought. If your thoughts are mostly negative, your life will reflect that. By consciously observing and reframing your thoughts, you can gradually shift your belief system and create a more positive, fulfilling reality.
The Ego’s Role in Keeping You Stuck
Even after working through a limiting belief, it can resurface in a different form. This happens because the ego clings to familiar patterns to keep you ‘safe’.
The ego’s primary role is self-preservation—it wants to protect you from perceived threats, including emotional discomfort. While this can sometimes be helpful, it also means that the ego resists change, even when that change is in your best interest. The ego convinces you to stay in your comfort zone by feeding you thoughts like “This is just how I am”, “What if I fail?”, or “Changing this belief will be too hard.”
Many people who undergo a spiritual awakening experience this firsthand. They may have faced a tough lesson, embraced spirituality, and then started preaching their newfound knowledge. However, their ego often sneaks back in under a new guise—the ‘spiritual persona’ that insists they have all the answers. The truth is, personal growth is an ongoing journey, and setbacks are part of the process.
How the Ego Creates Personas Based on Limiting Beliefs
The ego also constructs ‘personas’ that reflect our limiting beliefs. These personas become the roles we unconsciously play in life, reinforcing our fears and keeping us stuck. Here are some common examples:
The Perfectionist – Believes “I must be perfect to be loved.” This person constantly strives for flawlessness, fearing failure and criticism.
The Caretaker – Believes “I am responsible for everyone else’s happiness.” They put others first at their own expense, often feeling drained and resentful.
The Martyr – Believes “If I suffer, I prove my worth.” They reject ease and joy, believing struggle equals value.
The Overachiever – Believes “I am only valuable if I achieve.” Their self-worth is tied to accomplishments, leading to burnout.
The People-Pleaser – Believes “If I say no, I will be rejected.” They avoid conflict and suppress their own needs to gain approval.
Recognising these personas can help you identify the limiting beliefs they stem from. Once you become aware of them, you can start questioning their validity and choose to step out of these roles.
How to Start Releasing Limiting Beliefs
If you’ve identified a limiting belief, ask yourself these questions:
Where did this belief come from?
Is this belief absolutely true, or is it just a perspective I’ve carried?
How has this belief served me in the past?
How is it holding me back now?
What new belief would better support the life I want to create?
Monitoring thoughts can be aided by paying attention to emotions. If you feel anxious or fearful, take a moment to reflect: “What thoughts was I having that triggered this emotion?” For example, "I feel anxious and fearful, and before this, I was thinking: ‘What if I fail? What if I’m not good enough?’" These thoughts fuel the emotion, reinforcing a limiting belief.
I invite you to become an observer of your own life—your thoughts, actions, emotions, and patterns. If you think you’ve reached all the growth you could have had, observe again—this is most likely your ego.
Please live your life fully, enjoy every moment, feel grateful, and if you don’t, start repeating to yourself that you feel grateful and list the things you are grateful for. This is a powerful practice to shift negative thoughts. This is how WE HEAL THE WORLD!
Start small, but start!
Love and light!
Ingrid <3
